Deeper Meanings or Lack Thereof
Dec. 14th, 2025 10:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
haii2uShock sites have always been a weird little side interest of mine. There's just something morbidly fascinating about that era of the internet where really anything went. It wasn't out of the ordinary to click on a link and get the shit scared out of you by a Jeff the killer screamer which then instilled a deep sense of anxiety in you that still persists decades later (not speaking from experience or anything).
I've written about the significance of Blowfly Girl's story to me and this, I suppose, is an extension of that. On my art website (RIP, my password won't work and support won't e-mail me back) I wrote that I chose the username HAii2U (a reference to the site Hai2u) because "I like the juxtaposition of [...] femininity and unpleasant subjects", which is a fine enough explanation, but I feel like the real reason is a lot less interesting or artsy.
The image on the Hai2u site is gross. The film it's from and the man who made it are grosser, obviously I in no way support it, him, or the porn industry. There is very little artistic merit that can be squeezed from an ancient website hosting a jpg of a woman vomiting while performing oral sex. But does there have to be any at all? I assume the original purpose was to shock and disgust and it did that just fine.
I kind of apply that same concept to my own art: it's straightforward, no careful deep planning involved. It just is because I wanted it to be. My actual thought process behind picking HAii2U because I thought the image was gross and I like how the name itself sounds. And the specific capitalization is because it used to be HAII2U but someone on Reddit mistook it for a reference to Judgement from JJBA.
That being said I don't consider my work to be shallow or devoid of meaning altogether. That's why I enjoy sharing my work with others, because I like when people make their own connections. Nothing exists in a bubble, and while the author may have intended for the curtains to just be blue that doesn't mean there aren't subconscious biases that led her to pick blue in the first place.
There is a meaning to my art. Sometimes I haven't figure it out yet.
This entry took me weeks to write. Mostly because it's really difficult for me to put my thoughts into writing in a way that's both cohesive and also interesting to read. And also I'm just a lazy POS.
I've written about the significance of Blowfly Girl's story to me and this, I suppose, is an extension of that. On my art website (RIP, my password won't work and support won't e-mail me back) I wrote that I chose the username HAii2U (a reference to the site Hai2u) because "I like the juxtaposition of [...] femininity and unpleasant subjects", which is a fine enough explanation, but I feel like the real reason is a lot less interesting or artsy.
The image on the Hai2u site is gross. The film it's from and the man who made it are grosser, obviously I in no way support it, him, or the porn industry. There is very little artistic merit that can be squeezed from an ancient website hosting a jpg of a woman vomiting while performing oral sex. But does there have to be any at all? I assume the original purpose was to shock and disgust and it did that just fine.
I kind of apply that same concept to my own art: it's straightforward, no careful deep planning involved. It just is because I wanted it to be. My actual thought process behind picking HAii2U because I thought the image was gross and I like how the name itself sounds. And the specific capitalization is because it used to be HAII2U but someone on Reddit mistook it for a reference to Judgement from JJBA.
That being said I don't consider my work to be shallow or devoid of meaning altogether. That's why I enjoy sharing my work with others, because I like when people make their own connections. Nothing exists in a bubble, and while the author may have intended for the curtains to just be blue that doesn't mean there aren't subconscious biases that led her to pick blue in the first place.
There is a meaning to my art. Sometimes I haven't figure it out yet.
This entry took me weeks to write. Mostly because it's really difficult for me to put my thoughts into writing in a way that's both cohesive and also interesting to read. And also I'm just a lazy POS.
